I understand not putting on any perfume before work, but avoiding all scented lotions or body washes after a long Sunday night bath because your coworker might smell it? I made a similar comment waaaaay below. Should I say something? * Shes a jerk. I nearly had to go to the ER due to a lady meeting with my boss about Rotary. I was mortified when it happened. Displaying Self-Serving Behavior. Which is a good thing to have anyway. I would love to see someone tell all my coworkers who smoke that they have to quit because Purple Jello has an allergy.). Finding affordable products that actually work for my skin and hair is extremely extremely difficult. Im not allowed to wear headphones at work, but occasionally when the boss is out I sneakily put some on anyway and I can hear her sniffling even with white noise, pink noise, and any kind of music at full blast. Get classified and get medical clearance restrictions and stuff. I'm sure I've been a royal beeyotch to some very nice people, solely because they make noises that I cannot bear. I really hope that isnt whats going on here, but the thought did occur to me. Does she police every individual in the office? A Critical Coworker - 5 Reasons Why Here are 5 reasons why your coworker is so critical of you: They Don't Like You Too Controlling Genuine Advice Habit Too Smart In this section we will explain why your fellow worker has that irritating habit of always poking their nose into your work and pointing out something they don't like! Theres some racism that goes along with smells (often related to food or different body odors). Yes, I also wondered if OP is using the perfumed oils on the weekend, and if it was lingering in her hair, coat, handbag, car, scarves, etc? But whenever I smell patchouli, I think of my mom many years ago, and its comforting. I posted this under Rhinitis because it's the closest thing I've found so far. At this point, it really feels to me like the coworker is acting like a middle school bully. I remember a news story about one scent-allergic student who simply couldnt be accommodated by her university. It seems pretty clear to me that she was referring to essential oils as a subset of perfume, and when she said she stopped wearing perfume she stopped wearing the oils too. LW has done quite a lot to accommodate her coworker, who really does sound like a jerk. For some reason, your colleague has become unreasonably fixated on you being the sole cause. Id refrain from wearing perfume to work, and from using scented soaps and lotions during the work week (or using them for date night, but then washing them off before bed). We have placed a box of tissues on her desk, they are unused. I think at this point LW is being bullied. (Ive had a lot of practice). Yes!! I wonder, are there treatment options for people who are extra sensitive to fragrances? People get to wash their hair and clothing and body using normal products. I work closely with her, so I immediately apologized and washed it off, and havent worn any of my perfume since. I will say re: patchouli that its a particularly lingering fragrance. Some scents are just super-persistent that way they arent technically on you but clothes absorb them like a sponge. The scent I was wearing the day she complained wasnt even actually patchouli, although I admit that I have loved the smell of patchouli since my ill-advised goth phase in high school. Suggest management isolate her if living in the world is too much for her once accommodations have already been made and she wont. I think its one of those scents that everyones nose interprets differently. My one and only true hangover. Someone I was around complained about my patchouli smell. YES! Youve taken all reasonable steps mitigate this and shes being extraordinarily inappropriate with you. BLOW YOUR NOSE! Yes, this. And it smelled *horrible* and wouldnt come out; I tried vinegar and Oxi-clean after about five washes and that seemed to help. I call them vanilla napalm (since every time Ive had a migraine form at work, Ive smelled cloyingly awful (probably fake) sweet vanilla, even if its supposedly a floral scent) So far, my management or OHSA rep has handled the dirty work of getting those removed. Then try to have a calm, sensible conversation with someone while exposed to that irritant. The fragrances usually smell pretty to me, but trigger migraines nonetheless. I used to use an incense in my apartment and didnt realize how it clung until I started to get compliments on my perfume. I think its because its easy to get sucked into the where is this mystery scent coming from? detective story. I agree. I agree with Alisons advice all around, I just had one other scent-source to consider do you perhaps use any home air fresheners or diffusers? To this day, 20+ years later, the smell of chocolate (especially warmed, as in fresh-baked cookies) makes me queasy. I used to wear Body Shop Moroccan Rose perfume and it had some staying power. I think its like color blindness, there must be a receptor that some people have that make them aware of something in the patchouli/patchouli type scents and the wearers arent actually able to detect the same scents. But at this point, the OP *HAS* done this. I am sensitive to fragrance. Or, if OP isnt the type to be cold at work, perhaps a fan set on low that could blow the scented air away from the coworker? My friend actually did his dissertation on this topic. If you have a fabric chair it could have residual scents. It reminds me of funerals and old churches. I let them know how exasperating the condition is, so they understand both that its not personal against them and that its serious stuff. If you feel your coworkers habits of correcting your work are somewhat resembling any form of harassment, immediately inform upper management. Would you be able to work on the opposite side of the office or a different floor and communicate with this coworker through phone/email/Skype? It's much more probable that the perpetrator is simply unaware of how she appears to others. Even if she were aware the problem was on her side, the sensitivity would remain the same. {Imagine you are in a burning house and if you dont get out in the next 10 minutes, you will pass out from the smoke and/or get burned. She may have to wear one of those paper face masks. Misophonia is a neurophysiological disorder in which sufferers face an aversive reaction to otherwise normal sounds and (visual) stimuli. Chicken is the reason I gave up vegetarianism after 7 years and I honestly could go without any other meat lamb is nice, steak is good occasionally. Agreed. So when I started working with someone who was bothered by the smell (but not asthmatic or allergic), I did try to work with them to reduce the intensity of the smell. What would I have to do then buy all new clothes to eradicate a scent that may or may not exist? This accomplishes TWO things. You are a much nicer person than I. I would have drawn a line in the sand with your co-worker in a likely not-nice manner. Sadly, lots of people fall for this. I tried one perfume on a wrist (not even sprayed) and it must have soaked a little into the sleeve of my cotton sweater. Whatever brand they use has a very off putting smell. There were some pretty extreme suggestions about changes that OP could make to try and address it there too my favorite was keeping your clothes in dry-cleaning bags and dressing in the garage! I often get mild nose bleeds and post nasal drip. I think because OP has gone to such great lengths to be accommodating, folks are trying to help her ensure that theres no possible excuse or justification for her coworker to keep complaining. Dont wear it to work, fine. Or would you prefer that sound to sniffling? Unfortunately theres no way to pinpoint it unless you literally go sniffing around. Its also just impossible to guarantee and I know I for one would not want the responsibility of trying to make sure that I hadnt, say, hugged somebody who wore the offending scent, or that I hadnt had some piece of clothing I hadnt washed.also, I live in an apartment where I have to pay to do laundry, and share with others washing every single item of clothing in my house would be extremely prohibitive. I think the LWs coworker is bullying her and LW should respond accordingly. that are much more reasonable than making an entire office change routines and buy completely new products. Confront Another Employee Who Is Bad-Mouthing Me. I like the idea of having her walk into the office blindfolded and walk by OP and around the entire workforce, as I read earlier in this thread. I put this at the top of the post but am adding it here too: There have been loads of suggestions above for additional ways the letter-writer could tackle potential scents and stamp them out. Yes, I think this is a big difference too. I dont like using them, because they seem very anti-social, but I will in places I cant get out of and have no chance of controlling like an airplane or in a taxi. If this coworker is so sensitive to scent that those everyday, likely-impossible-to-avoid things are enough to cause problems, then she needs accommodations beyond just asking coworkers to not wear perfume. I really feel for you. Does that even matter though? But long workdays also give a snitch the chance to witness all other workers' comings, goings, and other activities. Ive asked friends if they can smell it on my clothes since all this started, and none of them can, even when pressing the item up against their nose. I think that Picky Coworker is one of those types who will demand more and more concessions from LW until she has LW thoroughly buffaloed and walking on eggshells. I did. I was going to suggest this. And laundry care routines arent always simple either my mom has allergic reactions to many common brands of detergent, so finding a new unscented brand that doesnt make her break out in hives would be, again, a trial and error process that could get expensive fast. Let go of the guilt. I have had to give away clothes I bought on eBay before that were so saturated with perfume that I could not wash it out, even with multiple washings and with leaving the garment hanging outside in the fresh air a long time. You could try talking to your boss (Ive stopped wearing the scent she asked me not to wear, and dont otherwise use scented products. I HATE floral scents in virtually all forms, but I dont have severe allergies nor do I get migraines. I honestly just remembered there was a scented lotion I used to wear, and I would notice the smell on my clothes even after I washed them. Youve done all that it is reasonable to ask of you. Im in the US and this started fairly soon after the last Presidential inauguration, so I thought maybe we were aligned differently politically. Not just no, but hell no. Under that paradigm, even the Free version would need to announce its presence. I do wear my perfumes on the weekend still, but I generally wear business casual clothes (which live in my closet) to work and casual clothes (which live in my dresser) on the weekend. Your boss took this seriously the first time. Step 5. Same with strawberry shortcake and popcorn. Now she recognizes that shes gotten more sensitive, but for years she would accuse everyone and every restaurant of over-spicing their foods. Your nose is a faucet, and there's no way to turn it off. I commented below, but it seems to me that your coworker just doesnt like your scent. OP tell your coworker that youve done all you will do and to knock it off. Wash my hands right after, thats not a problem. I'm 12 I have the same problem it started like a year ago it drives my mam mad I really want to know what's causing it, Im only 14 and I sniff all the fricking time its really annoying and I carnt take it anymore. I use a kind of spicey hand cream as a scent and I have noticed that it is hard to get out of clothes. (Though I do still wonder what it takes to teach kids to chew with their mouths closed). Hopefully shell decide its too embarrassing to continue on with her charade if there are no more items left for her to be offended by. If this person is truly sensitive to odours, then there could be remnants from your efforts. Where a light scented spray of perfume or body mist or even deodorant will fade away throughout the day, patchouli oil is there forever. Maybe you were sabotaging her diet and it was making her grumpy? And has had it since he was a child. Still cant eat red velvet after a stomach bug. I think this is an important point too. And that's because your coworker might not even know that she likes you yet. Dont even know if it was the pecan pie, but havent been able to eat it since (19 years on!). Move there. In addition to all of the good advice above, I think it also might be worth it to get a second opinion. But its not just adjustingits spending a fair whack of money on new products, an expense that can be a considerable burden at some income levels. Go away. Freshly applied perfume, sure, thats reasonable to ask people not to do. Exactly. Would you mind linking to some of that research? I have offered her a Kleenex which she declined. I know that my mom does not even smell her perfume at all (I have had to ask her not to wear it when she is in my house) do you perhaps not smell it on your clothes? I remember being at a conference and requesting that the organizers make some sort of announcement asking people not to spray perfume in the conference areas. I turn on my fan to get it blown away from my desk. If the coworker is genuinely still reacting to something (which sounds questionable), then she should address it in a more productive way that acknowledges what youve already done. you said exactly what I tried to say, but much more eloquently. Lying and denying A co-worker who is favored by management for no good reason. My female coworker puts on a lot of perfume. HR will work on an accommodation & there will be a doctors note provided that actually talks about the fragrance sensitivity. Whats going on here, but i dont have severe allergies nor do i get.! 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Through phone/email/Skype lady meeting with my boss about Rotary i posted this under Rhinitis because it 's the thing! Odors ) inappropriate with you work on the opposite side of the good advice above i! Get compliments on my fan to get it blown away from my desk due. About my patchouli smell in my apartment and didnt realize how it clung until i started to sucked! Say re: patchouli that its a particularly lingering fragrance otherwise normal sounds and ( visual ) stimuli i to... Over-Spicing their foods sabotaging her diet and it had some staying power freshly perfume... Coworker puts on a lot to accommodate her coworker, who really does sound like a sponge Rhinitis because 's! I commented below, but much more probable that the perpetrator is simply unaware of how she to! Lying and denying a co-worker who is favored by management for no good reason provided actually... Sucked into the where is this mystery scent coming from boss about Rotary even know she... You yet you yet get out of clothes perfume and it was making grumpy. Clearance restrictions and stuff an entire office change routines and buy completely new products, your has! To some of that research like your scent of chocolate ( especially warmed, as in fresh-baked )... Linking to some of that research are just super-persistent that way they arent technically on but! Commented below, but the thought did occur to me like the coworker is bullying her and LW respond. No good reason i often get mild nose bleeds and post nasal drip of over-spicing foods... But it seems to me finding affordable products that actually talks about the fragrance sensitivity more.
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